The Mysteries of the Universe

 

     So, a few years back, I had a psychologist say in a condescending, mocking tone "he thinks he knows the secrets of the universe" as I was at a hearing to determine how long I was going to be committed to a psychiatric facility. It was kind of an arrogant assumption on his part, as I never actually claimed to know those things. No one can know definitively the "mysteries of the universe" as that doctor so eloquently put it. 

      I just actually take the time to think about them and puzzle over them.  No one ever came to answers about their life and came to solve or understand mysteries without actually taking the time to think about them. Sometimes the answers to life's mysteries as they  pertain to you don't come from the external universe, they come from your internal one.  

      It's a matter of belief. Your beliefs structure your mind. In a sense, what you believe about reality shapes and provides the foundation to your reality. This is an internal process fed and fostered by internal thoughts and constructs as well as a great amount of external information you ingest.  In the more ambiguous, uncertain areas of life, you get the freedom to believe, for the most part, whatever you want to.  

  So when it comes to the scope of existence, or when it comes to the reality of a Creator, because of the natural uncertainty of these things I make the conscious choice to bite off the biggest chunk of a belief system I can think of and willingly choose to believe existence is infinite and it was created by an infinite and eternal Creator. It's either an "all or nothing" "go big or go home" mentality with me when it comes to my beliefs.

       As I mentioned above, your beliefs shapes your reality, at least the internal reality within your mind. The reason I choose to believe such big ideas and such massive imaginative constructs and maintain this kind of "infinitist" foundational view of existence and God is quite simple; it's absolutely, completely liberating, at least mentally and in regards to my internal mind. I can maintain this belief system about an infinite existence and an Infinite, eternal God and still function (relatively) normally in day to day society. 

     The promise of being able to explore, study, and compete/play games in an infinite creation throughout worlds upon worlds, cultures upon cultures, and civilizations upon civilizations is a euphoric, and mentally liberating thought, filled with immense hope and great purpose.  Doing this forever, as well as being in relationship with the Creator of this infinite Creation, is a state of existence that is engulfed in a liberty that is incomparable to, and greatly exceeds, any liberty I can have in my life.  It is the gift of God, and a massive demonstration of God's glory.  A truly eternal purpose and eternal array of experiences.

        Like I said, when it comes to your foundational belief system, "go big or go home." Don't worry about provability or falsifiability. You can do neither with infinity. No finite organism can validate the scope of an infinite system or prove beyond a doubt the existence of certain abstract concepts that are shrouded in natural uncertainty. 

    Having big beliefs and massive mental constructs is for my internal world more so than my external one. Let everyone else come to terms with their reality in their own way. If they don't want to believe in an infinite existence, or an infinite God, they don't have to. My beliefs aren't contingent upon the beliefs of those around me.

       As for "knowing the secrets of the universe" as the psychologist so eloquently made fun of me with?  Well, I know the secrets of my universe. The one within my own mind. That's all that matters. As you can see, I'm not one to shy away from telling people what's going on inside my head.  My internal reality is where I am truly free, unequivocally free, absolutely free. I can go explore my infinite existence if only in thought and ideation.  In my internal world, I can have far more liberty than I have ever had in this life and in this society.

       I could even be in a cage or institution, and still maintain that mental liberty. Even in my external world, where I am confined by financial, social, and economic limitations and a lack of the freedom that I want for myself I still maintain this mental freedom.  I can be a janitor and work like I do, and still be free in the mind. It's the one freedom I still have, but in this place, even that freedom can be deprived of you. The one freedom that can't be taken away is the liberty of the spirit given by the grace of God.

      My big beliefs set my mind free. My internal universe is my refuge and dwelling place. My faith and trust in God gives me the hope and knowledge that one day I will be fully immersed in the glory of God's infinity and the liberty to explore His creation in a more physical, more interactive way than I do now. In that infinite existence, there will be plenty of time and plenty of places to be that star athlete, that brilliant scientist, that deep-thinking philosopher, that world-explorer, that soldier, that hero, the endless experiences of eternity. 

     Plenty of time to be these things in an infinite existence. My faith and trust is placed in God's ability to make my dreams and thoughts and hopes into reality. There is no need to know the "secrets of the universe." I trust in the Lord to determine and reveal (or not) those secrets.  I just will choose to believe in an existence so vast that there are an infinite amount of universes within it. 

      At least, within my mind, the concept of an infinite existence is real, if but just a concept, but if I can think it, so can God, and any other intelligent consciousness more advanced than me.  That gives me much hope indeed.  An infinite existence brings with it the hope of eternal liberty and eternal glory that is only superseded by one thing; the absolute glory of God.